07/16/2024:

Haha, I coded a new section of the website for daily entries. I remember you said something about missing it heavily. So, I decided to start doing it again. Writing love letters is my love language ,,, You already know how much I despise speaking and how I find it extremely difficult to express my feelings with spoken words. Yet, when we were kids. You couldn’t manage to shut me up. We would speak about such incredibly touching and deep subjects for hours in a row. When normal people in my life are quick to drain me , you are not. Usually, I find any excuse to leave social gatherings , but I find I can stick around you for an eternity. It’s funny to me no matter how much I write I feel like words aren’t ever enough to ever hope to express how much I have grown close to you. Even my own love language isn’t enough to express my admiration for you. My days seem so dull until I get around to speaking to you, Remiel. No one in my life can ever hope to compare to how much sentiment our relationship has. I love you. I'll continue to write on here.

07/22/2024:

It has been enjoyable spending my summer days next you, but I am worried about the level of involuntary dissociation I am continuously going through. Why does everything seem so surreal to me. It seems beyond me. Remiel, even though I wish I could just get over it, you manage to soothe me and my dissociative symptoms. I want to be psychologically there because of you.

07/24/2024:

Something I think about all the time is how many people are going to be excited by my death. I feel like a complete failure to the people I love and adore the most and I know my loved ones feel the same way. I don’t want anyone crying in my funeral. I just want to make everyone happy.